Watch Saturday Night Live Highlight: Do You Know What I Hate ?: Night Watchmen



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The following rants are written by Eric Harris, as they appeared on his website (filename “wisdom2.htm”). The original source was the transcripts that are included in the Columbine Report and additional Columbine Documents, copied by a reader of this site and proofed by me to be sure the text appears exactly as it did in those scans. Any spelling, punctuation or grammar errors were Eric”s own.You can see a copy of the scans in the Columbine Report and the Columbine Documents (both huge downloads so be very patient) or on this site”s CD-ROM. Eric”s website content, including this page, can be found on pages 10410-10432 of the Columbine Report. Each page is noted in brackets in the text below. A similar rant appears in the Columbine Documents (pages 10356-10359).

You are watching: You know what i hate everyone. These are the words of wisdom from REB.This page explains the various things in the world that annoy the SHIT outa me. God i just LOVE freedom of speech. Keep in mind that these are just my point of views, and may or may not reflect on anyone else. I do swear a lot on this page. so fuck off if your a pussy who cant handle a little god damn bad language. heeeheee. And now to get started:—————————————————YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—When im walking around in a mall and there is this SLOW AS SHIT person walking in front of me!! Goddamnit im trying to get somewhere! So move it or loose it BITCHES!YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—When there is a group of assholes standing in the middle of a hallway or walkway, and they are just STANDING there and talking and blocking my fucking way!! Get the fuck outa the way or ill bring a friggin sawed-off shotgun to your house and blow your snotty ass head off!YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—When people dont watch where THEY ARE FUCKING GOING! Then they plow into me and say “oops, sorry.” or “watch it!” NNNYAAAA!!! Next time that happens i will rip out 2 of your damn ribs and shove em into your fuckin eye balls!!!YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE!!?—When some rich ass stuck up piece of shit white trash person gets in a car wreck with their brand new car!YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE!!?—When some stupid ass kid blows his fucking hand off because he couldnt figure out that a lit fuse means that the firecracker is going to go off soon!! HAHAHA!DUMBASS!!YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—OOOOOOOOJAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!! GOD I FUCKING HATE THAT WORTHLESS TRIAL!!Who in their right feeeeearrrRIGIN mind would care about that trial??!? its not any different from any other murder trial! Tell those fucking reporters to get a life! And what the fuck do we have to gain by watching that stupid trial anyway? Its not news! its a trial! not news!trail!trialX=Xnews!YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE I HATE!!?—Jon binay however the fuck you spell her spoiled ass name Ramsee!!! We dont care! Good fucking riddens!! What the fuck do you expect if you fucking put your kid in all these beauty pagents when shes 4 years old!! SLUUUUUUUUUUUT!!!! I bet her damn dad did it. Fuckin perrrv.YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!?—STUPID PEOPLE!! Why must so many people be so stupid!?YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE!!?—Making fun of stupid people doing stupid things! Like one time when i was watching this freshman try to get on a computer that needed a password….he typed in the password……..and waited. The retard didnt press enter or anything. He just waited. Then he started cussing at the computer saying it was screwed up. Then the freshman went and got a teacher and the fucking teacher could not figure out why it wasnt going anywhere!!! JESUS!! Personaly i think they should be shot.YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE!!?—Natural SELECTION!!!!! God damn its the best thing that ever happened to the Earth. Getting rid of all the stupid and weak orginisms……..but its allnatural! YES!I wish the government would just take off every warning label. So then all the dumbasses would either severely hurt themselves or DIE! And boom, no more dumbasses. heh.YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—ASSHOLES THAT CUT!!!! Why the fuck cant you wait like every other human on earth does. if you cut, you are the following: Stuck up, self centered, selfish, lazy, impatient, rude, and……damn i ran out. anyway. Every fucking line i get into i end up having to wait a fucking hour when there WAS only me and 1 other person in the line!Then the queer sucking asshole lets all his/her so called friends cut in behind em! If that happens 1 more time i will have to start referring to the Anarchists cookbook (bomb section).YOU KNOW WHAT I REALLY HATE!!?—LIARS!!! OH GAWWWWWWD I HATE LIARS. And living in this fucking neighborhood there is thousands of them!! Why the fuck must people lie so damn much! Especially about stupid things! Like “Yeah, I just bought 5 cases of M-80″s in Oklahoma for about $5. And they are legal there and everything. Yeah my parents buy most of my guns, every once in a while ill use my 4,000 dollar paycheck and buy a shotgun or 2. And my brand new hummer just broke down on the highway when i was going 250mph.

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Stupid cars.” like that, now, what fucking part if any would a norman human being believe? And thats just one person!! Another BIG example is Brooks Brown(# removed for privacy”s sake). Now, according to him, he has a 215 IQ, 5 other homes (2 in alaska, and 3 in Florida), 95mph fast ball(he is only 16), runs a mile in about 5 minutes, has an uncle thats the former head of all the armed forces and has access to…..Theee Button…, his other uncle is a multi-millionare that lives in downtown detroit, and his neighbors are the chick that sang “r.e.s.p.e.c.t.” and the lead singer of Aerosmith. And that same uncle owns 30% of the stock of that tylenol company. And his grandparents give..GIVE…him about 1000 dollars for each month, and his other Grandpa can blow up every house in America because all the houses have C-4 in the foundations. Again, according to Brook Brown. OK, when people lie like that, its not impressive, noone believes it, it sounds just plain stupid, and its a fuckin waste of my time.YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—R rated movies on CABLE! My DOG can do a better damn editing job than those dumbshits!! For the sake of all television they can atleast try to make it sound like actual words the person would say! If you have ever seen Aliens or Predator youll know what im talking about.YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—Windows Keys!!!YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE!!?—WAREZ!! Why pay when its free?YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—People who think they can forecast the weather!! Then they think that everyone else will think that they are cool just because you said that we were gonna have a 4 foot blizzard starting today! like just the other day, this punk i know was saying..”Yeah tomorrow we are gonna get like, 2 feet of snow in just a few hours. They were saying its gonna be the biggest snow in ten years. Yeah itll be about -60 outside too.” And that day we get an inch of snow and its 26 out. I feel like getting a baseball bat, breaking it over his head, and then STABBING him with the broken end!!!YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!?—Country music!!!YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE!!?—Zippo lighters!!!!YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—People who say that wrestling is real! now, im talking about the matches like hulk hogan or undertaker. If you think that these matches arent fakes and that these guys are REALLY punching and breaking arms, then please email me. I would love to know where you live so i can BOMB your fucking house and ACTUALLY BREAK YOUR ARMS!YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—YOUNG SMOKERS!they think they are so god damn cool with their big bad ciggarettes and their “sooo cool” attitude. I cant wait until they are about 25 and have they have to breathe through their fucking necks and talk with a computer hooked up to their X-vocal cords.YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—PAYING FOR MY CAR INSURANCE!YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE!!?—FREEDOM OF SPEECH!!!YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—Freedom of the press. I hate that part of the Bill of Rights.YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—People who are against the death penelty!!! i think the courts should fuckin fry convicts even if all they did was unarmed robbery!YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE!!?—SCHOOL!YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—SCHOOLWORK!YOU KNOW WHAT I REALLY HATE!?—COMMERCIALS!! OH GAWWD I HATE COMMERCIALS!!! The only ones i MIGHT like are previews and some car commercials. But jesus christ, all those Lotion, PERFUME, Makeup, JCPENNYS, Jostins, food, coffee, or advertisement commercials! Please! Destroy them all! never record another! They suck! They are only funny the first time! Think up other stuff! They suck! They are stupid! We get sick of them VERY FAST! VERY! VERY FAST!YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—People who dont believe in personal hygiene. For the love of god, and for the sake of god, CLEAN UP! Fucking people with 2 inch fingernails and a whole fucking pot full of dirt under them and raggy ass hair or shirts stained to hell. Or people that just plain stink, and they dont do anything about it. Now, im not making fun of anyone if they cant help it, or afford it or anything like that, thats not their fault, but if your some kid drivin a ford explorer and have yellow teeth, then thats just plain unhuman.YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—People who use the same word over and over plain! Like, “actually”, or “fuck you”, or “bitch”. Read a fuckin book or two, increase your vo-cab-u-lary ya fucking idiots.YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—People who try to impress me by TRYING to brag about the militaries weapons! Now, to some of you this might seem, wierd, but its happened. Like this, “dude, they just came out with this new chemical that can destroy denver only by using a cubic inch of it. The military is keeping it all locked up because if it gets to close to water it explode, and the force would create a cresent earth, maaan.” Yeah, right, bullshit, or like this, “Dude, the air force has tracked santa clause for like, 10 years now, and he is a real man. its all a cover up.” or “The air force just made a plane that can bend light man, its completely invisible.” now, this is just some of the shit i”ve heard. it makes me SICK. And they arent even in the fucking military nore do they know anyone that is!YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE I HATE!!?—People who THINK they are martial arts experts! They are all cocky and thinkin that they are all big and bad, saying bullshit like, “yeah if you snap your fingers right here the sound waves will melt the brain and youll die rom your own brain poring out your ears.” or “if you flick someone right here their arteries will burst and they will drown in their own blood.” fuckin hate it when they keep saying “your own”, like it would be someone elses!?!? then when these shitheads get in real fights the get their fuckin asses wooped all over the place by some little girl.

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YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—STARWARS FANS!!! GET A FRIKIN LIFE YOU BORING DICKHEADS!YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!—RACISM!!Anyone who belives that blacks, asians, mexicans, or people from any other country or race besides white-american….people who think that should be drug out into the street, have their arms ripped off, be burnt suht at the stumps, then have every person of the race that YOU hate come out and beat the shit out of you. and if you are female, then you should be raped by a male from the race you hate and be forced to raise the child! You people are the scum of society and arent worth a damn piece of worm shit. You all are trash. And dont let me catch you making fun of someone just because they are a different color because i will come in and break your fucking legs with a plastic spoon. i dont care how long it takes! and thats both legs mind you.YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!?—THOSE FUCKING ADVERTISING OR CHARITY CALLS! People saying “Hi, im not selling anything but”. good, now shut the fuck up and go get a real job!”well! you are so rude!” damn strait bitch and if you dont get off my line ill come down to your building and shove that phone list up your ass and take the phone and shove it up your bosses ass! “click” heeeheeee, i love that.YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE!!?—When people mispronounce words!and they dont even know it to, like ofTen, or acrosT, or eXspreso, pacific (specific), or 2 pAck, learn to speak correctly you morons.Thats all for now folks, hope you enjoyed! If i think up any more things, ill put em on here!And sorry if i offended you, but, if i did, that means that you are one of the people that i mentioned that i hate, so i guess im not sorry, you asshole.—————————————————Best viewed with Netscape 3.0+. Because AOL”s browser sucks nuts.


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